 Posted: Thu 9:37, 14 Apr 2011 Post subject: Jordan Alpha 1 Movie Review Wanted Universal Movie |
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McDonalds Gets Kung Fu Panda Film Review: Wanted Wanted Film Review The flick opens with our nebbishy hero, Wesley Gibson (James McAvoy), an accountant (natch) stuck in a dead-end job who only exists to get pooped on by everyone around him. Faster than you can say "wish fulfillment," he's drawn into a supermarket shoot-out between the sleek Fox (Angelina Jolie) and the menacing Cross (Thomas Kretschmann). No one's going into Wanted expecting Citizen Kane here. It's an excuse for big stunts, bigger explosions, lots of guns, and the occasional ass shot from the Divine Ms. Jolie. As a mindless blow-thing-up spectacle, this flick delivers exactly what it promises, no less and *definitely* no more. 4/10. McAvoy makes a great leading man, and pulls off the "zero to hero" story arc with aplomb. You can believe he's both a nerdy wage-slave and a nasty mofo. He's probably the only actor in this flick who gets a role he can sink his teeth into cheap air jordans, and he does it well. Let's hope he can use whatever profits he gets from this flick and puts it towards a film that properly showcases what he has to offer. After the bullets and automobiles stop flying, our hero gets an offer he can't refuse from Fox's boss Sloan (Morgan Freeman). He's the leader of a secret order of assassins called The Fraternity and he wants Gibson to dump his lousy life and become a suave, sexy hitman, able to violate basic laws of physics in a single bound. What follows is a thriller by committee: James Bond without the tuxedo, Tarantino without the wit, The Matrix without the philosophical underpinnings, and Star Wars without the galaxy far, far away. Wanted: Thriller by committee Everything in this movie has all been done before. For instance: a classic example of Chekhov's Gun occurs early in the film, when a quirky secondary character (read: cannon fodder) gives our hero a way of unleashing mayhem on those who deserve it. Will Gibson use that piece of throw-away advice in the final showdown? Gee, ya think! Oh Jordan Retro 11, and let's not forget the "plot twist" in the Second Act, which is lifted holus-bolus from The Empire Strikes Back. Yup, you got it: not everything is what you're supposed to believe in our happy little sociopathic paradise, and someone's gonna pop a cap (or knife) in Gibson's back when you (ostensibly) least expect it. But anyone who's seen any other thriller can guess the truth right from the get-go: the good guys ain't really the good guys, and the bad guys . . . you know what I mean. Yup, that's what you'll hear when you check out Wanted, the latest film from Timur Bekmambetov (Night Watch). It's a thriller by numbers Jordan Alpha 1, that asks you to check all sense of disbelief, reality, and any prior knowledge of cinema, at the door. What's so frustrating is that Freeman and Jolie are both so much better than this cr*p. Freeman phones in his stereotypical "wise old mentor" role, but with a soupçcon of menace, and Jolie simply struts around showing off her . . . tattooes. Both these Oscar-winning actors are some of the best thespians of their respective generations, but they know they're only doing this flick for the paycheque. Final Analysis Do you hear that? It's the sound of your brain cells rotting. |
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